Grasping

5/24/09…And now I understand. I understand why the Israelites wanted a King. In Your distress, You shook Your head because they did not understand. Israel was much better off to have You as a King even though they could not see or touch You versus one of their own which they could see and touch. Why? Because a human is flawed and will always be flawed. Even after You did great and wonderful things for the Israelites, for them it was not enough. Instead they desired to see and touch You, because there remains this inherent need in us. That is why You said it is not good for man to be alone…but even sending a woman was not enough. Oh woe! My ancestors demanded a King, and You relented, all the while knowing it was going to be a roller coaster ride, a train wreck, and one more way we let You down in our humanity. What must You be thinking? Our Creator, it is so hard for us to understand who You are because we cannot see or touch You. Even after You reveal yourself, we begin questioning was that really You?

Father…in Your grace, You have allowed me to better know You. At times I have felt the Holy Spirit, You, speak to me in my mind. I have seen how You engineered circumstances. I have experienced two manifestations of You…and now, I want to see and touch You, and because I cannot, I begin to doubt those things of You. Did I really hear You speak to me? Was it really You who engineered those circumstances? My tiny mind is unable to grasp who You are so it would rather grasp what is in the world.