Scoffer

7/25/12…Before I am able to get past the first twelve chapters, I keep coming back to this verse in Proverbs, He who corrects a scoffer gets shame for himself. I am unable to get past these words. I look up scoffer and understand it to mean an expression of mockery, derision, doubt, or derisive scorn; jeer. I was not expecting the word doubt to appear within the definition.  Doubt is a feeling of uncertainty about the truth, reality, or nature of something. I look up the word shame but find nothing on a deeper level. Certainly I understand correcting a scoffer is fruitless. I ask God if there are any scoffers currently in my life or ones in my past. As I am sure there are, only one comes to mind, and this hits a little too close to home.

The part I am unable to process through is the shame. Why would correcting a scoffer bring shame? I understand a scoffer might mock in return, or express derision, maybe even jeer. There could be doubt expressed. But why would this bring shame on me? I would probably just dismiss this person, or choose never to reengage. Father, the true meaning of what Solomon wrote eludes me.

I fear the knowledge may only present itself when it occurs to me. After all, words in the Bible do not come to life until we live them in experience. However, this sounds like an experience I would rather avoid.

Abominations Postlude

7/25/12…A final thought or two on abominations (see previous entry). In my life, I always thought the word abomination meant stirring up anger or hatred towards something. Now I know there is another meaning.

I also must unexpectedly acknowledge the way I viewed the two men who seemed to sow discord amongst the brethren has changed. At first, I passed judgment on them, and their behavior really detested me. I questioned whether this church was even the right place for my wife and I. In my heart, I sinned against both of them with my self-righteousness. Indeed, my pride put myself above them. This sort of disgusts me, but alas this is my confession.

This is the surprising part. Later my feelings turned into despondency. This I did not expect. Then my despondency turned into compassion for my brothers. Yes, abomination means stirring up anger or hatred towards something, and yet with Christ in me, these feelings eventually transitioned to compassion. This makes me wonder if my Father in heaven feels the same way, and somehow when those who spew abomination sermons from the pulpit actually miss the total picture.

Certainly the timing of reading this passage along with my real-life experience is curious. Proverbs 2:10 When knowledge is pleasant to my soul, discretion will preserve me; understanding will keep me, to deliver me from the way of evil. 

Abominations

7/23/12…This past week there was another passage coming to mind over and over. As I have prayed to God for wisdom, I do not want to blow through Proverbs in a couple of days. Instead I want to slow down and allow time for the words to soak in. In fact I feel there are words to digest which require time. I want to feel at peace before moving on. So I find myself stopping after chapter twelve and going back rereading the highlighted passages from the last week. One of those passages was in chapter six. When I first read it the last sentence really struck a chord with me. In this passage starting with verse 16, Solomon outlines six abominations to the Lord, and then adds a seventh, almost as if the seventh one is worse than the previous six. Whether or not this is the case or not, I am not sure.

The word abomination is a strong word. Within the context of the Bible whenever I hear of this I usually think of the Old Testament where in the Pentateuch the Lord shares abominations in His eyes. The one I seem to hear so often from pulpits is the one regarding homosexuals. So once again as I try to dig a little deeper, I look up the meaning of the word and find a list of the following definitions; abomination is anything greatly disliked or abhorred (to regard with extreme repugnance or aversion; detest utterly; loathe) or an intense aversion; a vile, shameful, or detestable action, condition, habit, etc.

In this context, I reread Proverbs and the list of the six abominations, all of which seem to make sense; a proud look, someone who lies, someone who murders, someone who devises wicked plans, those who run quickly seeking out evil, and those who speak false witness. I would not argue with any of these. They certainly are egregious and belong together. But the seventh one? I pause…then I read, and one who sows discord among brethren. One, I thought how unusual sowing discord is in the same list as murder. Two, I began to wonder if I do this in my life? Then I think about my past. Have I conducted myself in a way where I sowed discord among brethren? And what does discord really mean? Looking it up discord means in part a lack of harmony between persons or disagreement; difference of opinion; strife; dispute. So if I am sowing this among my brethren, then God views this along the same lines as murder. I am somewhat dumbfounded.

Five days later, my wife and I are going to church and a parishioner makes a snide comment about where we live and in a joking manner, they better make sure the Baptists don’t get hold of us first. Everyone around him laughs.

And then in the service, a person who is heading up the capital campaign makes a snide reference that we do not want others going to the Presbyterian or Baptist churches because the this church does not have the good facilities or such. As I listened to this, my heart sank. Is this really the reason to spend millions of dollars on building upgrades?

Keep in mind, this is only our third visit to this church, and as we have struggled to find a Spirit-filled church, hearing this was not good. I wonder if this qualifies as an abomination.

   

For some reason, I have a desire to hold this verse close to my heart on my continued journey. And I certainly wonder if I will ever outrun denominations; the answer is probably not. I can only hope I never contribute to this by railing against the very thing I detest. As I contemplate this more, the feeling I have is one of despondency, and I wonder if this is what God feels. Yes, the act itself is one of abomination. If indeed what I experienced is considered sowing discord, I find the resulting feeling I have is not anger, but a sad feeling of despondency, as if how is there any hope? Once realizing this, I realize the only answer is a Savior.

Indeed, the only logical answer God could provide human kind in our abominations is Grace.

Enraptured With Her Love

7/23/12…Certainly this passage in Proverbs spoke to me on a personal level:

18 Let your fountain be blessed

And rejoice with your wife of your youth.

19 As a loving deer and a graceful doe,

Let her breasts satisfy you at all times;

And always be enraptured with her love.

I find the blessing behind what the Psalmist wrote regarding meditating day and night on what is good. As I read the above words, I think about them not only in the moment, but at other times. The words in the Bible are all good. I do not recall anything within the Bible directing me in such a way which causes me intentional harm. Even in those cases where trials, tests, and tribulations are present, there is a greater good at work of which I may or may not know. The world directs me otherwise. The world directs me to chase. There is a lot of harm in chasing, especially in what the world is selling. 

As I read the above passage in Proverbs, I certainly felt not only continuing to find satisfaction with my wife, but letting her satisfy me at all times. Meaning this. There are times where she wants to connect physically with myself and within just this need, she finds an inner satisfaction I cannot understand. When those times occur, I need to let go and apart from feeling tired, or not feeling the same thing, indeed just let go. Let myself be enraptured with her love for me, even though I may not feel I deserve her love always. 

There was a moment this past week when I found myself at this crossroad. And suddenly this passage from Proverbs came to mind. And as this verse came to mind, I just let go…in her love.